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A Mensch in the White House
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Breakable News breaks new ground with a stolen transcript of a recent phone talk between Trump and his BBF Roger Stone
This scintillating report can be found at breakablenews.substack.com. Be the first on your block to read and forget what you read before any of your friends and neighbors who you haven’t seen for how long has it been now? Have a wonderful rest of your Sunday.
Stephen
Breakable News and an amazing journey into GOP’s Rabbit Hole of Perdition
To see, and even read, this awesome and totally unverified reportage–the very best in fake news–please go to our subsidiary at breakablenews.substack.com.
At this time of extreme national emergency, what to do?
We now have a madman as president. He has nine more days to serve out his term. But a madman with control of the nuclear codes can do a lot of damage. He could conceivably end human habitation on this planet. Oh, it’ll never happen, you might say and go on sipping your morning coffee. But only 85 or so years ago, many didn’t think Hitler would amount to much. He would certainly fade away and life would continue as usual. Millions of those people were soon exterminated in Nazi concentration camps. Today, the stakes are even higher. The fascist Trump is in charge for nine more days after a bloody coop attempt on our Congress, a coup he instigated. No sense sugar-coating it as he and his supporters are trying to do. He incited his rabid followers to violence and they responded with mayhem including the murder of two Capitol police officers.
So what now to do with this deranged meglomaniac, this fascist ogre? Impeachment? 25th amendment? Resignation? None look particularly promising in the short view. None look like they will solve the immediate national emergency of an extremely unstable man controlling the nuclear codes and the ability to easily launch nuclear missiles at the touch of a button. A coup has been attempted and it looked like it may well have been a conspiracy involving those in the present government. Trump may well have had knowledge of this planned coup and made sure his Pentagon chief delayed in sending any auxiliary troops to quell it. After all, he reveled in the sight of the violent mob tearing the Capitol apart and made no attempt to call the appropriate heads of the national guard to send troops immediately. That tells me he was complicit via omission. Trump has a knack for sequestering himself against responsibility, chronically casting the blame onto others. Well, this time, his circled wagons have run out of cover.
That makes me think of another option that has always been anathema to the American ways of solving political problems: the use of the military. With other options too weak, impractical, or untimely, military intervention may be the only way to resolve this national emergency and pave the way for a smooth transition to Joe Biden’s ascendancy to the presidency. The military could immediately enter the White House and do one of two things: arrest Donald Trump for suspicion of treason or simply take away the nuclear box and codes under his control. Whichever the generals felt most comfortable with would be fine with me.
Once Trump and/or the nuke codes were secured, I would guess Pence would then invoke the 25th amendment and take power until Biden was inaugurated. The military has never been inclined to get involved in politics so would not, as they did in Brazil in 1964, be tempted to remain in power. Biden would transition to his duly elected position as President.
Do I want this to happen? No. I don’t think the Constitution provides for this, although I am not an expert on what this complicated document says. But I think it very well must happen to solve this current urgent national emergency.
The only other solution is prayer, but the angels are already quite overwhelmed with other matters.
May peace and healing arise from the ashes of 6 January.
Trump Needs to be Arrested and Charged with Treason, Sedition,and Inciting to Riot
Trump, Guiliani, Flynn should be arrested immediately for inciting to riot. Rioters should be rounded up and jailed. Congresspeople who insist on questioning the outcome of the election should be censured and, if possible, kicked out of Congress. Hawley and Cruz should resign, now. Today was an insurrection, as Biden called it. Trump knew this would happen and did nothing to dissuade the rioters. He in fact encouraged them and incited them to violence, resulting in destroying part of our Congress building putting our legislators in fear and harm.
One protester was shot dead. And even more importantly, Capitol Police officer Brian Sicknick was murdered in the violent uprising. In other authoritarian countries, perpetrators would be rounded up, jailed, and possibly executed. The difference here is the perpetrator is the President of the country. I’m convinced he knew this would happen and may have even been part of the planning. Trump should be arrested as he is a danger to the country. He is an insurrectionist, attempting to overthrow the election, our constitution, and our government.
What more does he have to do to warrant arresting this traitor? Our Congress has been invaded by thugs who were incited to riot by Trump. That is a crime, and no person, including the President, is above the law.
Whatever the outcome of his impeachment trial, Trump and others of his ilk who incited the riot should be charged with either accessory before the fact of murder or felony murder and tried, hopefully convicted, and sent to prison for a long, long time.
Donald Trump, here! Make your contributions directly to the Pres
A Breakable correspondent, I.O. You, stumbled upon, guess who?, the Donald himself at the Ohio State Fair, at a booth entitled CONTRIBUTIONS WELCOME HERE.
“Hey Ja, make your contributions here, donations here, MAGA supporters, Proud Boys, QAnon, Anybody”, Trump was hollering at the top of his lungs.
IOY: President Donald, what up?
DJT: Our debt reduction fund is running low, You, so we figured a direct appeal was in order. Rallies just weren’t drawing like they used to. But this election is not over, not by a long shot. Excuse me.
Step right up, step right up, ladies and germs. THE President here to receieve your donations. We’ll take whatever you got: cash, check, bitcoins, or your first born. Whaddya got, ma’am?
Woman at booth: Oh, Mr President, this is such an honor. My husband’s got the Covid, my kid’s in jail for cocaine possession, and my daughter’s now making adult films, but here’s my life savings. Wish it could be more, but it’s all we got.
DJT: Excellent, excellent, loyal subject. BTW, what’s your daughter’s number? Just joking. You know, locker room stuff. Have a good day. Oh, what’s your bank account and password, by the way?
Now, You,any other questions. I’m a busy man, as you can see.
You: We’re nearly 280 thousand dead with Covid, Sir. What’s your current strategy in your final days in office?
DJT: Now wait just a goddamn moment, sheishead. What do you mean, final days in office. Don’t you listen to Guiliani, America’s Mayor? We’re turning this rigged election around. He tells me we found another ace witness who is a brother in law of an election official in Wisconsin who told a friend who then told Rudy’s cousin that several ballots were added to the final pile. We’re going to my Supreme Court with that obviously reliable evidence and should get a year 2000-type decision shortly. So don’t give me that final days in office bunk. I’m a winner by a lot.
You: Yes, sir. Sorry sir. I just heard…
DJT: You heard? You heard? You just heard the truth from me, period. Get it?
You: Got it.
DJT: Good.
And that, dear readers, is right from the horse’s mouth. A pooper scooper if we ever had one. The President of the United States at the Ohio State Fair pitching for contributions to his ongoing, and perhaps perpetual and chronic fund raising efforts to fuel his ever-demanding lavish lifestyle. Is there no end to his supporters never-ending love of this man? A story to be continued, we’re sure.
Another flash from Breakable’s wireless, and mostly useless, news service: Amazon is now officially and virtually the only viable remaining retail outlet available for purchases within the continental US of A. You can buy anything from a peppercorn–that’s one peppercorn–to a side of beef at the tap of a finger. And, as Jeff Bezos always says, if we don’t have it, you don’t need it. As we say here in the Breakable newsroom, Hail to Amazon! Long Live Amazon!
And finally, a Zoom tip o the day: No matter how messy or chaotic your place is during these pandemic doldrums, you can create an illusion of order and domestic bliss with a lovely backdrop from IKEA. Special this week: Buy a 9×12 scene of the Swiss Alps and get a street scene of the Champs d’elysee for free!
Carry on, dear readers. We know you’re burnt out and fatigued, but hang in there: Help and hope are on the way!
The Planned Donald J. Trump Presidential Lie-brary
Planned exhibits for Trump’s Planned Presidential Lie-brary include:
- The Fraud Room–includes photos, tapes, microfilm, old voting machines, emails, death certificates of voters, and videos of all frauds perpetrated during the Trump years, mostly proven by Trump’s own panel of raters. Featured Fraud is, of course, the 2020 election which he actually won “by a lot,” so said Trump himself.
- The Lies Room–actually this comprises three huge rooms of some three million Trump lies, some never before revealed to the general public. Featured lie is coronavirus is like a little flu, will pass “like a miracle,” and can be treated by swallowing bleach. These are organic rooms in that archived lies are added as they come in which is daily, even minute by minute. So check these pages often. We scream worldwide at TrumpLieBrary.con.
- The Golf Room–for the first time the Lie-brary reveals that Trump’s actual number of rounds were 3 times more than reported. Twelve actual scorecards are included in the featured display, seven of which show redacted numbers in Trump’s own blackout style. A secondary feature shows Trump’s actual handicap, also redacted.
- The Executive Order Room–this room features 317 EOs with nothing written on them except Trump’s signature. These were apparently written for photo ops with Republican bobbleheads behind him nodding approval to show his base all the campaign promises he’s kept. The Lie-brary considered including these in the Con Room, but one of Trump’s sons objected.
- The Con Room–this includes great and effective cons from Trump’s life before and during his reign–er, term of office. Top of the list is Trump’s Birther campaign against former President Obama, which after years of trumped up evidence trying to show Obama was not native born, he finally dropped the effort when he himself saw he was even conning himself while all the time convincing himself he was right all along. A Conning the Con Himself Room is tentatively planned by the Lie-brary. Other displays include The Pro-Life, Anti-Abortion Con, The Law and Order Con, and The I’m a Very Rich Man Con.
- The Revisionist History Room–this is unlike any other presidential library room in history. Here, a wax figure of Trump is elegantly displayed next to a portrait of Lincoln, under the heading The Two Greatest Presidents in American History, with an appropriately revisionist note, “President Trump is actually THE greatest President as he did more for Blacks than even Lincoln.” There are also revisionist displays concerning Putin, Un, Netanyahu, and our troops. A Mount Rushmore Room is in the planning stages for when the National Park site can be modified.
- Trump’s Health Room–fully 17 actual letters, dictated to Trump’s doctors by Trump himself and actually signed by said MDs. These have never before been revealed to the press or the public, and give the REAL picture of Trump’s health from his own mouth, mood, and mind. It’s also the inner Trump, for the letters include his mental health from his very own perspective. This room should be very popular, “probably more popular than any other room at any other Presidential Lie-brary,” Trump told Newsmax.
- Fake News Room–there’s nothing in this room except blank walls at present. A proposal is afoot to rename it the He Who Smelt it Dealt It Room.
- Rally Room–a huge, empty ballroom, with moveable walls, designed to crush, or put the fear of Trump, on friends and foe alike.
- The Trump Family History Room–here are some of the littlest known con men and women in history. Actual DNA of some of these characters is displayed in attractive bell jars, as well as mug shots and prison numbers of many. Bring a lunch when visiting this room: You’ll be there awhile.
- There are several basement rooms in the planning stages that will feature dimmed or no lighting, echoing acoustics, a hall of mirrors to distort any sense of reality a visitor may have had upon entering the Lie-brary, and a room completely wallpapered with Trump tweets “throughout the year,” also designed to disorient visitors (or mesmerize his cult followers) upon entry.
- The Lawsuit Room–this will take you step by agonizing step through each of the 10,000 lawsuits Trump has filed against others over the years. Although few have gone his way, Trump shows, in his own words, those were fraudulent and politically motivated and designed to demean his greatness. Evidence is not provided as the room ran out of space.
- Gift Shop–these rooms take up fifteen of the sixteen floors of the entire Lie-brary, filled with Trump memorabilia, tchotchke, bobbleheads of him and all of his surviving enablers, and assorted tourist bling-bling, all with Trump’s official stamped signature.
Scheduled opening of the Trump Lie-brary: TBA, pending the outcome of the election.
Hours: TBA. Appointments necessary.
No masks or social distancing allowed.
Groups of any size permitted.
Phone number by special arrangement. Delays up to five hours.
The RNC and Donald Trump approve this message, which is the underlying lie that underlies this lie-filled post.